Marriage

Although C. S. Lewis wasn’t married at the time he wrote Mere Christianity, he described marital oneness and love with amazing insight:

The Christian idea of marriage is based on Christ’s words that a man and wife are to be regarded as a single organism—for that is what the words “one flesh” would be in modern English.

And the Christians believe that when He said this He was not expressing a sentiment but stating a fact—just as one is stating a fact when one says that a lock and its key are one mechanism, or that a violin and a bow are one musical instrument.

The inventor of the human machine was telling us that its two halves, the male and the female, were made to be combined together in pairs, not simply on the sexual level, but totally combined.…

What we call “being in love” is a glorious state, and, in several ways, good for us … It is a noble feeling, but it is still a feeling. Now no feeling can be relied on to last in its full intensity, or even to last at all. Knowledge can last; principles can last; habits can last, but feelings come and go. And in fact, whatever people say, the state called “being in love” usually does not last. If the old fairy-tale ending “They lived happily ever after” is taken to mean “They felt for the next fifty years exactly as they felt the day before they were married,” then it says what probably never was nor ever could be true, and would be highly undesirable if it were.

Who could bear to live in that excitement for even five years? What would become of your work, your appetite, your sleep, your friendships? But, of course, ceasing to be “in love” need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense—love as distinct from “being in love” is not merely a feeling.

It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit, reinforced by (in Christian marriages) the grace which both parties ask, and receive, from God. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when they do not like each other, as you love yourself even when you do not like yourself. They can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be “in love” with someone else.

“Being in love” first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it.

Lewis, Mere Christianity, (New York: The Macmillan Company, 1958), 81, 84–85.

WATER BAPTISM

Water baptism is a significant milestone in the life of every Christian. Water baptism is a biblical teaching and sacred practice for true followers of Christ. While baptism itself has no power to cleanse or save from sin, it is an important step of obedience in a believer’s life as an outward acknowledgment of the salvation experience that has already taken place.

Jesus Himself emphasized the importance of water baptism when He gave the Great Commission in Matthew 28:19 “Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.” (NKJV)

Abundant life

There is a delightful story about a farmer whose farm had fallen into disrepair. He was struggling economically and simply didn’t have the resources to make ends meet. So, he decided he had no choice but to sell the farm. He contacted a realtor who came and surveyed the farm and did an appraisal. The realtor wrote a glowing report about the farm for the real estate listing. After reading the listing, the farmer said to the realtor, “I have decided not to sell; I have always wanted a farm like that.”

Kierkegard wrote:

“The moment I take Christianity as a doctrine and so indulge my cleverness or profundity or eloquence or imaginative powers describing it, people are very pleased; I am looked upon as a serious Christian. The moment I begin to express existentially what I say, and consequently bring Christianity into reality, it is just as though I had exploded existence – the scandal is there at once.”

This is a difficult piece to chew. But think of it this way. It is easy to talk about mission. But when rubber meets the road, our talk could drive us into maintenance thinking or  into scarcity thinking. When rubber hits the road, creative thinking is shrunk, so is our risk-taking, vision and stewardship and we settle on selling the ‘farm.’

It is not time to sell the farm. It is time to invest. It is not time to give into a culture of scarcity. It is time to affirm we are the stewards of a culture of abundance. It is not time to be hopeless. It is a time for Esperanza!

There is no death, or maintenance, or scarcity, in Christ – in whose risen presence we live and work. Because of Christ we can expand our vision, expand our risk-taking, expand creative thinking, expand our mission, expand our stewardship. Because of Christ, we represent to the world a culture of abundance.

Generosity Changes Everything

I have come to know and appreciate friends of Victory Fellowship Southern Methodists to be a generous people. They have demonstrated their  generosity time and time again. But there is room for considerable growth when it comes to our stewardship. It does not appear to me that we have yet achieved the spirit or commitment of the Macedonians. Paul say of Macedonians;

“We want you to know, brothers and sisters, about the grace of God that has been granted to the churches of Macedonia; for during a severe ordeal of affliction, their abundant joy and their extreme poverty have overflowed in a wealth of generosity on their part. For, as I can testify, they voluntarily gave according to their means, and even beyond their means, begging us earnestly for the privilege of sharing in this ministry to the saints.” II Corinthians 8:1-4

Paul goes on to explain the generosity of the Macedonians. “This was totally spontaneous, entirely their own idea, and caught us completely off guard. What explains it was that they had first given themselves unreservedly to God and to us. The giving simply flowed out of the purposes of God working in their lives.”  (II Corinthians 8:4).

“Without a vision, the people perish” (Proverbs 29:18) and that “without funding, the vision will perish.” We are called to share in the drama of Christ’s death and resurrection – to give our lives away in grateful acknowledgment of the grace we have received so that others might be saved, so that others might have abundant life. This means giving ourselves unreservedly to God and to one another.

Fellowship must begin in our homes as we understand that marriage is all about permanence

Marriage is all about permanence. It simply is what it is — a permanent commitment made by a man and a woman who commit themselves to live faithfully unto one another until the parting of death.

Marriage lasts because of its fundamental status. It is literally what a healthy and functioning society cannot survive without.

The modern age has brought the rise of individual autonomy, the collection of populations in cities, the weakening of family commitments, the waning of faith, the routinization of divorce, and a host of other developments that subvert marriage and the commitment it requires.

Added to this list is the phenomenon of cohabitation. Cohabitation weakens marriage — even a cohabiting couple’s eventual marriage — because a temporary and transitory commitment always weakens a permanent commitment.

We are reminded of marriage as God’s gift and expectation, and of the divine goodness of it. We are also reminded that it is our Creator, and not we ourselves, who knows that we need permanence before experience.

1. Honor the Institution of Marriage:

In the New Testament, the structures of marriage and family are explicitly affirmed, even as the church is identified as the new family of faith.

Marriage is the cornerstone of fellowship in family and church life. Children and churches do better in life when participants enjoy a good marriage.  Our churches should do more for marriage than host weddings.

Just as the church and world needed a reformation in the 16th century, our culture desperately needs a reformation today–a reformation that begins at home. A Family Reformation. The battle for the soul of America must be won in the homes of its people as couples learn to fellowship with one another and with God.

“At the end of your life, the only thing meaningful you will leave behind will be your family – so work the hardest at making it a success.”(CW)

Marriage is certainly one of the most important commitments that individuals make in their lifetimes. Healthy marriages are associated with greater physical and emotional well being. Couples who share a Christian commitment and are part of a faith community have stronger marriages.

A successful marriage is marked by two inseparable qualities: holiness and happiness.

‘Holiness is not  achieving sinless perfection but having one’s heart fully fixed on God, setting aside all other affections” (JW).

A Christian family should strive for holiness and happiness. This is attainable as each participant  aim for the purity, simplicity, and communal power of the early church.

The marriage institution and the family structure are under heavy spiritual attack and as Christians we must never readily give up on them.

If you are married, your marriage is worth fighting for even though the battle is long, tough and lonely. At this time, like never before, we need to patient (long-suffering) with our spouses and prayerful as we look to God for strength, wisdom and an answer to the challenges we might be facing in our marriages.

Choose to “hate divorce…” (Malachi 2:16); though God permits it in the case of adultery (extra marital affairs) or rejection by an unbelieving spouse, divorce is not encouraged amongst Christians.

Divorce hurts! The pain it imparts on children, in-laws, friends and even careers and businesses is real. As Christians we must offer comfort to our brothers and sisters who have gone through it; we might not approve of their action but we must still love them as individuals while holding on uncompromisingly to our belief in God’s word.

While God hates divorce, He does not hate divorced people. Divorce is not the unpardonable sin and God does forgive and loves them and so should we.

2. Set boundaries for all friendships

Strong marriages are built by spending time together, laughing together, and playing together.  Avoid spending unnecessary time with persons of the opposite sex.  Emotional adultery starts when friendship with the opposite sex goes too far. Most people who have affairs never meant to, it all began with an innocent relationship which somehow crossed the line.

3.  Keep wise company:

He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm. ( Proverbs 13:20; NIV).

A bad company will produce bad counsel and a good one, good counsel. Scriptures states:

“He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.

4. Choose Sexual purity if you are single.

Chastity is non-negotiable for a Christian single and it goes beyond not having pre-marital sex. It involves avoiding anything, thoughts, words, or actions, which can create and seek to satisfy sexual desire.

“But don’t think you’ve preserved your virtue simply by staying out of bed. Your heart can be corrupted by lust even quicker than your body. Those leering looks you think nobody notices — they also corrupt.” (Matthew 5:28, THE MESSAGE)

“God wants you to be holy and completely free from sexual immorality.” (1st Thessalonians 4:3, TEV)

Start Something You Cannot Finish

According to the New Testament, one of the most important insights about the Christian ministry is this: We will not finish what we begin.

Paul in I Corinthians 13 states: “I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth.” Paul speaks of his role, by the grace of God, to act as a skilled master builder laying a foundation. He understands that others will come to build on that foundation. Ultimately the true foundation of the Church is none other than Jesus Christ.

Today, we stand on the edge of transition. The completion of these monumentally important chapter of our lives is appropriately marked  by self-surrender as our hearts are drawn to the future as we imagine what God will do by his grace and for his glory.

Today our focus is on the start of new ministries, missionary journeys, and opportunities to serve the church for whom Christ died. As we do so we are reminded that

Christian ministry is not a career

  Christian ministry is a calling that originates in the sovereign majesty of God and is concluded only by the coming of the kingdom of the Lord, and of his Christ.

In the church age, ministry is handed from generation to generation. Our humble determination and our heart’s desire must be to receive this charge and to serve faithfully — planting and watering in the fields of ministry and taking care how we build upon the foundation laid before us.

The Lord God spoke through his prophet Joel to promise that older men will dream dreams and young men shall see visions. Powerful, faithful, and compelling dreams and visions animate our transition.

Today we must face the future anticipating to join a line of faithfulness that reaches back to Moses and Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, Jeremiah and Ezekiel, John the Baptist and John the evangelist, Peter and Philip, Paul and Apollos. It extends through generations punctuated by names such as Athanasius and Augustine, Luther and Calvin, Whitfield and Wesley, Asbury Spurgeon,  Moody, Havner . . . and etc.

If we aim to finish what we are setting out to start in ministry, we are aiming too low.  We must aim to receive the stewardship of ministry that has been passed on to us and give our all to this calling so long as we live. We must do so knowing that in due season, we must pass this ministry to a generation yet unseen and unborn to continue this ministry and extend the reach of the Gospel to the lost until Jesus comes.

Therefore, let us set forth to serve, preach, teach, and tell the world about Jesus until he calls us home or until Jesus breaks into our human history.

True Worship

Micah 6:8 reminds us of the conditions God set for true worship on His promises to Abraham, namely to do righteousness and justice (Gen. 18:19). Additionally, the directions for Israel from God (via Moses) come to mind:

And now, Israel, what does the LORD your God  require of you, but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all His ways and to love Him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul, and to keep the commandments of the LORD and His statutes which I command you today for your good? (Deut. 10:12,13)

Both Samuel and Hosea emphasize God’s preference for obedience, knowledge, and mercy over sacrifice and burnt offerings. (1 Sam. 15:22; Hos. 6:6.). Adam Clarke suggests that for man to do justly, he must render unto everyone that which is due to them. Of course Clarke does not mean “what is due them” in men’s eyes, but “what is due them” according to God’s will.

Luke’s gospel records the following rebuke by Jesus to Pharisees:

“I’ve had it with you!  You’re Frauds!  You keep meticulous account books, tithing on every nickel and dime you bet, but manage to find loopholes for getting around basic matters of justice and God’s love.”  (Luke 11:42).

True worship is not keeping meticulous account books. True worship is paying attention to matters of justice and God’s love for all people. It is easier said than done.

With every parable, Jesus invited his own followers to hear and see a new way of being the “church.”  He said,

“But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame and the blind.  And you will be blessed…”  (Luke 14:13-14a)

Jesus is articulating a new vision of righteousness based on Micah 6:8. James chapter 4 concludes that true worship is this: to feed the hungry and care for widows. To do justly alone is not sufficient for a child of God; we must love mercy and do what it requires. Mercy comes from characteristics that include kindness, benevolence, and charity. Part of what mercy requires is to be willing to forgive the sins of others as God is willing to forgive our sins. It is this aspect of mercy through which our own salvation comes (Titus 3:5)

True worship allows us to not only share gospel, food, water, health care, education and community with the poor; but also address, advocate, even fight the demonic systems that create and sustain poverty.

We dare not offer the gospel in Christ’s name without offering bread in Christ’s name.  And we dare not offer bread in Christ’s name without addressing the very political and economic systems that brutalize human beings beyond our imagination.

True worship is a call to live like Jesus. Jesus took upon himself the image of a servant that we might have life and have it in abundance. Christian faith is a call for the spiritually poor to minister as they receive good news and for those who are not poor materially to do ministry with the poor. This should not be confused with ministry over, ministry for, ministry upon, or ministry against the ‘materially’ poor which is basically an offer of sacrifice and burnt offerings that God hates like he hates divorce.  Ministry with the poor is a way of obedience, knowledge and mercy which God prefers.

In the final decade of John Wesley’s ministry, he warned against the increasing tendency of Methodists to retain wealth instead of sharing it with those in need, saying it correlated directly with a decline in their spiritual growth and the progress of the revival.

True worship is  a call to humility. It is only through a humbling of ourselves that we will be allowed to walk with God.

“God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” (1 Pet. 5:5.)

Paul points out that it is high-mindedness that leads to unbelief and lack of faith in the power of God (Rom. 11:20; 12:3). The humble attitude required by the Lord will make itself manifest in a life of prayer, contrition, and ministry with the poor.

By wisdom a house is built

The second-century writer Tertullian said:

“How beautiful then the marriage of two Christians. Two who are one in home, one in desire, one in the way of life they follow, one in the religion they practice, nothing divides them. Either in flesh or in spirit, they pray together, they worship together, they fast together, instructing one another, encouraging one another, strengthening one another. Side-by-side, they visit God’s church and partake God’s banquet. Side-by-side, they face difficulties and persecution, share their consolations. They have no secrets from one another, they never shun each other’s company, they never bring sorrow to each other’s hearts. Seeing this Christ rejoices, to such as these He gives peace. Where there are two together, there also He is present.”

King Solomon spoke of the mortar of the marriage merger in Proverbs 24:3-4:

“By wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established; and by knowledge the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches.”

Marriage demands a lifetime process of relying on God and forging an enduring relationship according to His design. It’s more than a mere mingling of two humans-it’s a tender merger of body, soul, and spirit.

Three biblical purposes of marriage are:

• The procreation and nurture of children.
• A remedy against sin — that “believers might marry and keep themselves undefiled members of Christ’s body.”
• Companionship throughout life, through good and bad, comfort and loss, sickness and health, until death parts husband and wife.

King David warns,

“Unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain who build it” (Psalm 127:1).

Prayer for Families:

Gracious God, who created the families of the earth, we commend to your care all of the families of this community, and all of the families of this world.

We pray this day that each home may be a home where peace is practiced. We pray for those homes where there is no peace – where there is danger, violence, hurtful words, and
unceasing activity. We pray for children, youth, and adults.

We pray for parents, stepparents, and foster parents. We pray for those who are single and those who are married. We pray for those in caring relationships and for those who feel they have no one who cares for them or loves them.

May your grace be present to all. Grant us wisdom to seek God’s peace in our homes, in our communities, and in our world. Grant us courage to work for peace in our homes, in our communities, and in our world.

Grant us hope so, when we see only the mean actions of humans, we remember your presence and the promise of peace.

Amen.

Lesson from House Fly

The house fly’s direction is continually changing (watch one for a minute if you don’t believe me), and so it never really goes anywhere in a directed fashion. It has speed, yes — but no actual sustained progress. Therefore, the house fly doesn’t have velocity.

As long as you’ve got speed and direction, you’ve got velocity.Velocity is a vector measurement of the rate and direction of motion or, in other terms, the rate and direction of the change in the position of an object. The most common way to calculate the constant velocity of an object moving in a straight line is with the formula:

V = d / t

where

• V is the rate, or speed
• d is the distance moved
• t is the time it takes to complete the movement

HEAR THE WORD

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”

Matthew 11:28-30 (NLT)

Christian Walk

God longs to make a difference in our lives and our world as we commit to Christ-honoring fellowships.

Fellowship, for the Christian, centers in Jesus Christ. This means three things:

1. A Christian is related to others because of Jesus Christ; Christians must have one another to give God’s word reciprocally to each other.
2. The path to others is only through Jesus Christ; All relationships with one another and God are through Christ. He is our peace, wrote St. Paul, and the avenues to others wind through him.
3. The Christian is incorporated in Christ from eternity to eternity: We are incorporated into Christ and shall be with him and one another in an eternal fellowship.

On Death and New Life

I Corinthians 15:54 apostle Paul wrote;

So when this corruptible shall have put on incorruption, and this mortal shall have put on immortality, then shall be brought to pass the saying that is written, Death is swallowed up in victory.

The moment of death makes us acutely conscious of what a person has made of oneself, and what that person has done to others. Even without belief in a day of judgment, the living turn death into their judgment. The death and funeral of a human being grows out of and seals the kind of life these events conclude.

We live within a world of death. People, animals, plants and even inanimate things die. All about us, buildings, furniture and trees wilt, melt, and sag in the process of dying. We may raise our spirits with the thought that every moment of death is simultaneously a moment of birth, or that the declination of one pattern of matter is the growth of another. But these ways of thinking are not how we experience our own mortality.

It is easier to be optimistic about the condition of the natural world, or the progress of science or the development of cities, than it is to be optimistic about our own self. An ordinary wholesome person usually does not focus attention on the fact that buildings and people are dying: mortality outside oneself is something only faintly sensed, like a mild irritation. But the awareness of one’s own mortality is much different in those moments when it springs to the forefront of one’s mind.

In those moments the experience of mortality can shake us with fear as we recognize how death stamps us through and through. As the years flick past we can so easily feel like a climber slipping down an ice-coated surface, scrabbling desperately and hopelessly for a handhold. Life slips by and offers no handhold, no moment of permanence, no pause while time stands still.

Death mocks every human activity. But most of all it mocks what human beings most eagerly pursue, a loving permanent relationship with another human being. When two people do finally achieve or discover that marriage of true minds, that sense of being one person a dozen enemies threaten it from outside. The most inescapable enemy is death.

Death tears parents from children, lovers from each other and breaks the embrace of husband and wife at the end of a committed life. The last enemy is the worst. Even though we dodge or delay its coming, we know that there is no final evasion of death either for ourselves or for those we love.

Yet we must remember that in essence, the moment we die, our spirit and soul can go to be with the Lord if we so choose to place our faith, hope and love in Jesus. This is the scriptural way death is swallowed up in victory.

2 Corinthians 5:8

Yes, we are fully confident, and we would rather be away from these earthly bodies, for then we will be at home with the Lord.

John 14:1-3

“Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.”

“ARE YOU FOR REAL?”

According to this parable of the WHEAT AND TARES in Mathew 13:24 – 30, Jesus says that there are false professors, or counterfeit Christians.

A good counterfeit bill will look like a genuine note and it will feel like a genuine note to MOST PEOPLE. But to those who are familiar with real currency, they can SEE the difference and they can FEEL the difference.

For every good thing that God gives us, satan attempts to create a counterfeit. God gave us music, and satan has created an industry that ruins the blessing of music. God gave us his word and satan tries to produce a counterfeit. God gives revelation and satan created false revelation. God gives, and satan attempts to counterfeit. Satan has a counterfeit for nearly everything God has given us. Satan also has a counterfeit salvation that makes counterfeit Christians.

What is a counterfeit Christian?

A counterfeit Christian is someone who looks saved, talks saved, acts saved, BUT IS NOT SAVED! They usually believe they are saved. Some know they are not saved but want to fit in with those who are.

They say the right things, wear the right clothes, hang out with the right people, some even pray and read their Bibles – EVERYDAY! BUT they are lost and going to Hell!!!

ARE YOU FOR REAL TODAY?

God knows who is real today. When he looks down right now he sees: wheat, wheat, wheat, wheat, tare wheat, tare, tare, wheat, wheat, tare, etc. Sheep Sheep Sheep Goat.

Midlife

When the signs of age begin to mark my body …. and still more
when they touch my mind….
When the ill that is to diminish me or carry me off
strikes from without or is born within me….
When the painful moment comes
in which I suddenly awaken to the fact
that I am ill or growing old….
At that moment when I feel I am losing hold of myself
and am absolutely passive within the hands of the great unknown forces that have formed me….
In all those dark moments, Loving God, grant that I may understand that it is you … who are painfully parting the fibres of my being in order to penetrate to the very marrow of my substance
and bear me away within yourself.
The more deeply and incurably that evil is encrusted in my flesh, the more it will be you that I am harbouring —

you as a loving, active principle of purification, and detachment.

The more the future opens before me like some dizzy abyss or dark tunnel, the more confident I may be of losing myself and surrendering myself in you, of being assimilated in your body ….
Holy One, you are the irresistible and life-giving force….
You are the Stronger One….
It is on you that falls the part of consuming me
in a union that can weld us together.
It would be a blessing to die while actually receiving the body and blood of Christ in holy communion….
But I ask for something more precious — the grace to welcome death itself as an act of communion with you.

— adapted and based on a prayer from Pierre Teilhard de Chardin.